|
I just ran the Cambridge Half Marathon. A year ago, a single mile took me 13 minutes, and that was me trying my hardest. Running 13.1 miles would have sounded ridiculous then.
I started running this summer when my friend Hannah signed up for the JP Morgan Chase 5K with me.
Before then, I’ve never ran more than a mile or two. To practice, we ran around 1 mile from Mission Bay to Dogpatch. I was slow and tired during this mile, but the breakfast we ate afterwards was delicious and rewarding.
That single run didn’t motivate me to start running though.
The day of the 5k came.
It was a crazy event. So many people came. When I started running, I was among a group of people. It was truly a transformative feeling to be running alongside a huge group of people who came for the same reason.
I tried pacing myself alongside some people around me, and ran my first mile decently fast.
Then, I started to struggle, I had to keep telling myself, keep going, keep going, keep going. I couldn’t bring myself to stop running because everyone around me was running. The high school volunteers who cheered us on and high-fived runners also helped me keep going.
I wanted to at least run the whole thing.
After pushing through for a while, I started to realize that my negative feelings were beginning to fade away. Throughout the summer, I’d been feeling pretty lost and anxious when thinking about my future. That began to fade.
I started to cry a bit during the last mile. But I felt refreshed. Like nothing mattered. Like the pain I was experiencing during the run overrode everything else in life. This might have been runner’s high for me.
And then I was done. It was such an amazing feeling knowing that I persevered through the thoughts of giving up and walking during the 5k. It was the farthest I’d ever run, and although I was slow, finishing felt so good that I wanted to keep going.
That’s when I started running on my own.
Every time I felt unwell, I ran.
Every time I felt good, I ran.
Then, my friend Hannah brought up the idea of a half marathon.
I was immediately intrigued, but also scared. I wasn’t sure if this was a distance I could do.
So, I started challenging myself.
I first ran 6 miles, making sure sure I didn’t stop in the middle. Then, I tried running faster on 3-mile runs. Then, I attempted 8 miles, and some more fast 3-mile runs.
I could tell I was getting better.
This process of going from being a terrible runner to a not-so-good runner was so rewarding. It not only forced me to challenge myself every day, but also taught me to accept the fact that a lot of people in the world are better than me. This humbling experience made me more accepting of being bad at things and making slow progress.
Then, the day of the half marathon came.
I got up, and I ran it. My legs were extremely tired afterwards, but it was so fulfilling.
I want to keep running.
|